Musician Vivian has spoken her truth, admitting that she was not ready for marriage when Sam West proposed to her on live TV.
The Chum Chum hitmaker also says it was a bad idea to have Sam as her husband and manager.
“The truth is that neither I nor Sam was ready or mature enough for this. In all honesty, even at the time he was making a public proposal on live TV, I was not ready for marriage, and that does not mean I am negating the whole marriage.
“I was just trying to set up my career as I had come from another relationship just as he had. Dating and marrying him as my producer compromised opinions and decisions. It was a bad idea. I was floating,” she said in an interview with EveWoman magazine.
Vivian said she was in a bubble, thinking her marriage with Sam would work.
“The situation was difficult. He was my producer and manager and now my husband. It would have worked if we had thought it through. Ours was more of an image thing than a real relationship.
“We had brokenness from our families, and other life issues, which we brought into the relationship. In public, we were all fine yet in private things were messy. I have come to learn that couple goals are dangerous,” she said.
Vivian said she is now trying to piece her life and career together.
“I am not here to place blame on Sam. I am sharing my story to tell the world the truth about my life as I move to the next phase. I made mistakes and I sometimes feel like there was a spiritual force behind this. I must also admit that it is rather tragic to be delusional over logical things,” Vivian said.
“To be honest, many people, including family members, did not say much about the situation. They let us make final decisions for ourselves. Separations can be deadly,” she added.
Vivian has since joined a Psychology and mission school in her quest to turn over a new leaf. She has also dropped a new song with dancehall star Wyre dubbed Rhythm and Flo.
“My marriage ended, and it was a nightmare. I am not afraid to start again. Now, I know better. It does not matter who wants to judge me. I take personal responsibility and show up for myself. I am learning to honour myself. As much as I have survived this season, there are things I decided not to fight. And these are lessons I will teach myself,” she said.