Hilarious Primary School Student English Composition.

July 31, 2012
I was asleep snoring ng’rrorrr ng’rrorrr.The chicken shouted 3 times.I opened 1 eye & left the other to sleep a bit.I was wishing i had slept with my uniforms putted on but i realized if wishes were chickens beggars wld be laying eggs.I woke up …with only 1 eye openn & i was looking where the pramastof was put,i wash my face.I cooked a tea without milk.I drank the tea haphazardy & hurriedy with a piece of sadza which had remained last night.I put on my uniforms & then painted myself with fat & becoz there wa no kiwi i had to paint my shoes with fat to.I took my paperbag put books & pens then ran everything.I beated the 1st corner hardly then as i was beating the 2nd corner i heard th school bell cry nkgrirriririri ngkririrriri! I knew my buttocks were on fire 4rm teacher on duty.When i reached the gate!!
You dont want to know!! Mr Dube was standing at the gate with a big black hozpipe.

I was so afraid dat i almost urinated.I was asked ”Y are u late?” i said my pramastof was poured with water last night” teacher asked ”What had dat to do wit your coming to school late?” I told him the stove was late to burn so it delayed cooking strong” he said ”dat is no excuse!!Touch your toes to greet the world” I started to remove my shoes so i can touch the toes but he told me i just meant bend.He gave me the 1st beating on my buttocks,he he he it was hot & boiling,i dried dat 1.He gave me the 2nd one papa!!dis one was much hotter & i started hearing to cry.When the 3rd one was given to me i heard somuch pain dat i touched my buttocks.Teacher Dube said ”You have erased dat 1,i will have to give u another 1” When i was given the 4th 1 tears started getting out of my eyes uncountallably.The teacher said ”You removing tears 4 who?I dnt want to see even a smell of tear,ran to class & dont late
tomorrow!!” My buttocks as i went to class were hearing as if sitting in a burning pramastof.From dat day i sware i’l neva come 2 skul late.

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