Valentines Special: Application To Marry My Daughter… Hilarious

FILL THE FORM IN YOUR OWN HAND WRITING AND IN BLOCK LETTERS.
I ___________________    ____________________    __________________, hereby apply to marry your beautiful daughter Sir.
I am _____ years old.
Please answer the following questions honestly.
1. Do you go to church/mosque?                                Yes/No
2. Do you have a degree or diploma?                        Yes/No.
3. Are you still a virgin?                                                  Yes/No.
4. Are you working?                                                         Yes/No.
5. Do you have a car?                                                       Yes/No.
If your answer to any of the above questions is NO, do not continue & quietly leave my house. Don’t look back as you walk out. If all your answers were YES, then you may continue.
1. In 50 words or more, describe the disadvantages of cheating in marriage.________________________________
2. With the aid of a diagram, explain how you can give respect to your father/mother in-law.
3. Suppose your wife says, “Honey, I need money for my hair at the saloon”, what would be your answer?___________________
4. Explain any TEN causes of divorce. ________________________________________
5. What does the term ‘good husband’ mean to you? ______________________________________
6. Do you have both your mum & dad?      Yes/No.        If No, explain why?
7. Were your parents legally married?       Yes/No.        If YES, for how long? If the time of their marriage is less than your age, explain why you were born out of wedlock.
8. Explain the meaning of ”COME HOME EARLY” as used by married women. (100 words)
9. Give any THREE reasons that can cause a man to sleep outside his house.
10. In case of divorce, who do you think is the owner of the kids between father and mother?
Answer the following by Yes or No.
1. Do you drink alcohol?                               Yes/No.
2. Do you smoke?                                        Yes/No.
3. Are you short-tempered?                          Yes/No.
LAST PART, BUT EQUALLY IMPORTANT.
1. When can you be free for interviews? ____________________
2. When can be the best time to interview your dad?____________________
3. When can I interview your mum? ____________________
4. When can I interview your church pastor/ mosque imam
5. Please stick your passport size photo below, which will be put in all the daily newspapers for 1 week to cross-check if you have other girlfriends or on wanted list by NSIS, CID, Police or other law enforcement agencies.
Sign here: ___________
Sign again: __________
Thank you for showing interest in my daughter. Your application will be processed in 18 month’s time. You will be acknowledged only if you emerge successful. As you wait for my response, please don’t call me, or visit me, or contact my daughter, you will be disqualified automatically.
Leave your details in case I need to ask you more questions.
Postal Address:  ______________________________________________
Email: ______________________________________________________
Phone: _____________________________________________________
Facebook user-name: _________________________________________