7 Unforgiving Responses from Kenyan Matatu Conductors

March 18, 2016

matThis week a video of a woman assaulting a matatu conductor went viral. It is a situation most of us have found ourselves in, where the fare announced at the stage is below what is demanded on the road.
The story has brought to light other injustices committed by matatu crews on passengers.
Here are 7 unforgiving responses given by Matatu conductors.
#Stolen
1. An elderly woman complains about the music “Wekeni nyimbo za Yesu”
Conductor: Mathee, Yesu bado hajatoa album
2. Passenger: Kuna kiti?
Conductor: Hao wengine wamekalia ndoo?
3. Passenger: Kuna kiti ama ni zile uongo zenu?
Conductor: Hehe kama ulikua unaogopa kukosa kiti si ungebeba yako.
4. Passenger: Bwana hii gari ina joto sana!
Conductor: Basi shuka upande fridge.
5. Conductor: Madam, kuna seats pale nyuma.
Passenger: Siwezi kaa seats za nyuma. Nataka ya mbele.
Conductor: Kwani za nyuma ziko nje ya gari? Basi wacha dereva ashuke ukae mbele.
6. Passenger: Tao ngapi?
Conductor: Mbao
Passenger: Niko na kumi
Conductor: Iyo nunua avocado ujipake uteleze mpaka tao.
7. Passenger: Dereva ongeza volume tuskie Mwalimu King’ang’i
Conductor: Ungeskiza Mwalimu wa shule ungekua na gari yako si kutusumbua hapa na King’ang’i

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