Ken on 14th Jan

Kamau and an American man are sitting next to each other on a long flight from London to Bermuda . The American man leans over to Kamau and asks if he would like to play a fun game. Kamau just wants to take a nap, so He politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The American man persists and explains that the game is...

Ken on 13th Jan

Google: I know everything. Facebook: I know everyone. Internet: Without me, you’re nothing. . . . . . . Electricity: Keep talking fools. ************************************************ The pastor announces, “If you know your wife is controlling you, move to the left.” All the men in the church moved to left except one. The pastor...

Ken on 10th Jan

This week we’ve been treated to a lot of Waiganjo – the fake PPO, plus other fake police officers… and it has emerged that Waiganjo was just another self employed Kenyan struggling to make ends meet. Not forgetting it’s January, and specifically the week when schools opened. We have a picture to elaborate the situation on the...

Ken on 10th Jan

Prof. of Algebra: a “KISS” is infinity, because it is two divided by nothing (not zero). Prof. of Geometry: a “KISS” is the shortest distance between two lips. Prof. of Physics: a “KISS” is the contraction of two mouths, due to the expansion of the heart. Prof. of Chemistry: a “KISS” is the reaction...

Ken on 10th Jan

Tumulike TABIA ZA USHAMBA SASA. 1. Ka ukiwatch game ya Futa ni lazima upunguze volume ya TV ndo uwashe Radio uskie nayo, wee ni mshamba. 2.Ka wee ni dame na unavaanga skirt, na short ya Jeans ndani wee ni mshamba. 3.Ka we ni dem na unavaanga stockings kwa kichwa ukienda kulala, hiyo ni ushamba kuruka. 4.Ka we ni dem na unavaanga Ngotha Oversize ama...

Ken on 10th Jan

A family was supposed to stay the night at a hotel, but there was a screw-up with the rooms, so Grandpa had to sleep in the same bed as the 15-year-old grandson. In the middle of the night Grandpa woke up and shouted, ‘Quick! Get me a woman,fast!’ The grandson moaned, ‘Please,Grandpa,calm down. First, it’s three o’clock...

Ken on 08th Jan

I’ve often been terribly disappointed by the tourist guidebooks written about Kenya. Most of the time they tell you stuff you already know, like “you can go on safari and see some lions.” That’s probably why you wanted to come here in the first place, so that’s not helpful. Other times they give you all manner of useless information....

Ken on 08th Jan

1. Girls drawing their eyebrows like they’re sponsored by NIKE.2. Fat Girls In Leggings (this breaks my heart)3.Pink hair, purple hair, orange hair, green hair. Might as well become a clown!4. Complaining about how life is treating u!5. Statuses like “I love my MAN (who asked you? and who fuckin cares? Tell him not us)6. Updating your Facebook...

Ken on 07th Jan

The more you think of it, Kenyans are peculiar than you think. An article published in July last year was yesterday trending and was the subject of a viral Twitter trend. The report was written by the magazine Smart Planet, and based on particular criteria, Nairobi was declared the second worst place to live in. Worse than even Mogadishu. The report...

Ken on 07th Jan

1. Kama fobe ni kununurio, razima uende na pace ya Mnunuzi. Akikunywa porepore, kunywa porepore. Akikunywa na haraka, pia wewe kunywa na haraka. 2. Mwenye kununua fobe ndio anafaa kupeana story. Wanunulio waskize story sa mnunuzi. 3. Ni hatia kukosa kusheka wakati mnunuzi ametoa jokes. Hapa tuko biasharani, kukosa kusheka itafanya mnunuzi aboeke aashe...