Ken on 10th Jan

Prof. of Algebra: a “KISS” is infinity, because it is two divided by nothing (not zero). Prof. of Geometry: a “KISS” is the shortest distance between two lips. Prof. of Physics: a “KISS” is the contraction of two mouths, due to the expansion of the heart. Prof. of Chemistry: a “KISS” is the reaction...

Ken on 10th Jan

Tumulike TABIA ZA USHAMBA SASA. 1. Ka ukiwatch game ya Futa ni lazima upunguze volume ya TV ndo uwashe Radio uskie nayo, wee ni mshamba. 2.Ka wee ni dame na unavaanga skirt, na short ya Jeans ndani wee ni mshamba. 3.Ka we ni dem na unavaanga stockings kwa kichwa ukienda kulala, hiyo ni ushamba kuruka. 4.Ka we ni dem na unavaanga Ngotha Oversize ama...

Ken on 10th Jan

A family was supposed to stay the night at a hotel, but there was a screw-up with the rooms, so Grandpa had to sleep in the same bed as the 15-year-old grandson. In the middle of the night Grandpa woke up and shouted, ‘Quick! Get me a woman,fast!’ The grandson moaned, ‘Please,Grandpa,calm down. First, it’s three o’clock...

Ken on 08th Jan

I’ve often been terribly disappointed by the tourist guidebooks written about Kenya. Most of the time they tell you stuff you already know, like “you can go on safari and see some lions.” That’s probably why you wanted to come here in the first place, so that’s not helpful. Other times they give you all manner of useless information....

Ken on 08th Jan

1. Girls drawing their eyebrows like they’re sponsored by NIKE.2. Fat Girls In Leggings (this breaks my heart)3.Pink hair, purple hair, orange hair, green hair. Might as well become a clown!4. Complaining about how life is treating u!5. Statuses like “I love my MAN (who asked you? and who fuckin cares? Tell him not us)6. Updating your Facebook...

Ken on 07th Jan

The more you think of it, Kenyans are peculiar than you think. An article published in July last year was yesterday trending and was the subject of a viral Twitter trend. The report was written by the magazine Smart Planet, and based on particular criteria, Nairobi was declared the second worst place to live in. Worse than even Mogadishu. The report...

Ken on 07th Jan

1. Kama fobe ni kununurio, razima uende na pace ya Mnunuzi. Akikunywa porepore, kunywa porepore. Akikunywa na haraka, pia wewe kunywa na haraka. 2. Mwenye kununua fobe ndio anafaa kupeana story. Wanunulio waskize story sa mnunuzi. 3. Ni hatia kukosa kusheka wakati mnunuzi ametoa jokes. Hapa tuko biasharani, kukosa kusheka itafanya mnunuzi aboeke aashe...

Ken on 06th Jan

Today we look at how to fix a computer running on one of the three main operating systems, Windows, Mac OS and Linux. Then, we tell you how girls’ Google searches are different from boys’… But to start the week, we have an old pic of today’s cover girl and certainly it’s been a long journey. © nairobiwire.com...

Ken on 03rd Jan

Conda: haya haya pesa kwa mkono… Kibaki: wee kodaakta ni peesa gaapi, nashuuka haapo haapo beere… Conda: finje… Kibaki: mavi ya kuuku, buure kabisa! Hapaana, niko na forty, ama unifikiishe mpaka huuko huko kwa mraago diipo nikuupe iiyo fifty! Conda: nyinyi wenye mnafinyana hapo nyuma-raila, uhuru na mudavadi, mtu akuje akae kwa...

Ken on 28th Dec

Lifted From Facebook and Twitter, the following are some of the best Ati_____ , Kwani _____? jokes.   ati mat ni 300 kwani nashuka na viti? Ati kuona simba 500? kwani ni simba wa yuda?Eti bra ni 900!kwani ni long sleeved? ati unga ya ugali 200,kwani inakam na mboga? Ati kuingia marine park Ni 7k ,kwani wako Na ile whale ilimeza Jonah?ati bash ya...